Deep Roots for Wild Vines
“Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down, without walls.”
When you see a meme or a news headline that pushes all your buttons, what’s your gut reaction? How about when someone cuts you off in traffic? What kind thoughts run through your head when somebody walks by who you can tell at a glance is very different from you?
It can feel so effortless and satisfying to pile up everything that’s wrong about whatever is upsetting us and fling it back at the source like a truth bomb. All you need to do is look at current events and social media to realize that people behave as if thinking and saying whatever they want is their God-given right. We want to do something about the world’s problems, so immediately we label every person and every issue, compiling mental lists of all the reasons we’re right. We’re quick to declare our opinions, but how much time do we spend listening? Would we be experiencing such troubling times if reacting with negative emotions and criticism was the best response to sin, pain, and controversy? As always, God’s word tells us what we need to hear.
James 1:19 says, “So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.”
Whenever possible, the Bible tells us a wise and godly person pursues peace, keeps their negative opinions and reactions to themselves, and chooses to overlook offenses (Proverbs 15:1, 19:11, 26:4-5, 29:11). If it’s necessary to speak up to prevent harm, God warns us to respond with humility and gentleness, instead of lashing out or arguing. He makes it clear that our goal is not to satisfy our own feelings in a confrontation, but to extend His truth and love in such a way that draws the offender toward the church (Galatians 6:1, 2 Timothy 2:24-26). When you ask non-Christians or former believers who've fallen away from Christ, their most common issue with the church is a history of feeling preached at by people who weren't willing to listen to or understand them. No one who feels criticized, misunderstood, or unloved has the mindset of repentance. As followers of Christ, we’re responsible for turning unpleasant situations into opportunities for salvation by extending the same loving grace God shows us when we sin (Colossians 4:5-6).
The apostle Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 that the secret to successfully navigating a tense situation with your Christianity intact is self-control. As one of the fruits of the Spirit, self-control is part of the foundation of a godly life. Paul compares us to very disciplined runners competing for a prize. Unlike an athlete, we don’t have to rely on our inner strength alone to restrain ourselves; instead, the eternally focused perspective of a Christian allows us to realize that our joy doesn’t depend on our current feelings or circumstances. We’re able to make choices with eternity in view. We can choose the right way, the higher, more difficult road because we know where it leads.
Jesus offers us further encouragement when He tells his disciples that God guides and disciplines us, like a farmer training grapes to grow on a trellis (John 15:1-8, Isaiah 5:1-2). The Bible uses vineyard imagery throughout both the Old and New Testaments to show how God provides for and oversees His people. Wild grape vines bear fruit that’s acidic and sour. Without a farmer to prune the vines or a trellis to support the weight of the fruit and circulate air to prevent disease, the vines will die. On the other hand, vines under the care of a skilled farmer grow deep roots that equip them to survive for many years and produce good fruit.
Christians are used to practicing self-control when it comes to universally recognized sins such as fornication, drunkenness, stealing, or lying, so we've already built up better than average levels of self-control. What would happen if we used the same level of vigilance in controlling our reactions to controversial and offensive situations as we do to other temptations? How many souls could we restore if we reach out in love instead of dishing out a verbal slap (Ephesians 4:15)?
Maybe we don't let it all out on social media or when we're face to face with someone, but what kind of dialogue is going on in our minds? The real battle happens there. Our thoughts are the step we take before we speak or act. When we invest our energy and emotion in negative reactions, even if it's only on the inside, we're already putting one foot into the devil's trap. Unless we stop anger, criticism, complaining, bitterness, and other negative reactions as soon as they come into our minds, they'll take over like weeds. We can't afford to waste our energy on negativity. We need everything we have to love God and our fellow man (Luke 10:27).
Athletes prove that humans are capable of using the effort they could've put into reacting to fear, pain, or other problems to perform. If they can overcome their emotions using their own strength, we can depend on the power of God to provide a way for us to overcome too (Philippians 4:13, 1 Corinthians 10:13).
Prayer journal prompt:
Think of a situation where your first reaction was anger or criticism. If you put yourself in the other person's place how would you feel? How would your perspective change? You probably already know the scriptures that point out the sin that upset you, but what scriptures can you find that help you with your response?
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